The Diary of a Pineapple
by Siamofelici
Summary: The strange happenings from the Vongola Mansion through the eyes (and pen) of our favorite fruit head.
1. Entry 1

(XX/XX/20XX)

Ciao~

Oi, that darn boss... Tsunayoshi handed out diaries to everyone like we were jr high girls. Well, Chrome actually IS a jr high girl, but really...

He told us all to 'express our feelings' by writing in a 'journal' instead of fighting. Like that will work. But he said it with his stern 'I'm the Boss' face on so no one challenged him. Man, he really is scary when he's like that...

Why would I write that in pen?!

Sigh, well, I'd best be getting back to packing for my mission. Hibari's not going to annoy himself either, kufufufufu...


	2. Entry 2

A/N: My sister helped me figure out how to put in an author's note and disclaimer. Gosh I'm such an idiot... =w=

That's the only reason I updated in the same day, for this disclaimer.

DISCLAIMER: KHR does not belong to me. Or Mukuro. Or diaries.

(XX/XX/20XX)

Another day, another 'herbivore' comment. Did I do something to Hibari yesterday? I think I'd remember that. He just sent me a death glare and muttered first thing in the morning.

Really, it's quite annoying when I haven't done anything yet. Sheesh, maybe I SHOULD do something to get him back...

I think I'll just have to put something in his room later that rhymes with 'chakra delusions'...~


	3. Entry 3

Oh my gosh I already have a reveiw! :D Thank you! I couldn't send a reply thanks to the cheap 24 hour rule... But thank you! X3

Disclaimer: Khr is not mine, it is all Akira Amano-sama's work.

(XX/XX/20XX)

Well today was rather interesting to say the least. During a very tense dinner, smoke came out of the kitchen, and when Gokudera went to investigate, flames blazed and caught everything on fire. Stupid Hibari tried to bite it to death using his tonfas. He blamed me when they got burn marks on them(figures).

No one's sure who started the fire and burnt down half the mansion(forcing us to stay in a stupid cheap motel), but I'm pretty sure Tsunayoshi suspects me or Takodera. Oya oya, how dare he?

Ehh I suppose he _might_ possibly have some reaon to suspect me but I would never go as far as to-

Wah he saw me writing in this! Wipe that smirk off your face, Decimo...


	4. Entry 4

A/N: If this ever popular at all, I might just do a diary for someone else on the same events. Or Varia. Varia is always good. ^_^

Disclaimer: I no has Reborn! unfortunately...

* * *

(XX/XX/20XX)

Everything's been wonderful. Just nice.

For example, for lunch, I had a chocolate sundae courtesy of Sonic. I got to laze around all day without a mission. I beat up a punk on the street giving me dirty looks(revenge Tsunayoshi, haha, now you have paperwork). Oh, and did I mention...

WE SHARE TWO ROOMS AT THAT LAME MOTEL.

The construction crew screwed up the mansion so now we've been here for two weeks, all the Guardians in one room, and mechanics in the other. All the girls got to go to a much nicer hotel, and no one ever knows where the little Sun Arcobaleno ever is we've been trapped together in a room with two beds, and tensions aren't high. They're phsychotically through the roof!

Considering the cow-brat actually did blow up the roof, even the bellhops and other employees are on edge with us. We're Mafia for crying out loud! We should have better rooms for free! Not stuck together with a crowd-a-phobic skylark and Stupidera's annoying Box Weapon!

I'll just go out and make someone give us better rooms at no money using... 'techniques' that've never failed me before, kufufufu...

Hey, I think I'm actually starting to enjoy this journaling thing!...

* * *

Random thought: I don't really mind the house smelling like vinegar, in fact, I love it. (Don't ask...)


	5. Entry 5

Disclaimer: I do not own KHR.

* * *

(XX/XX/20XX)

Oh my gosh, don't you just love Tsuna? He's like, so awesome.~ But Hibari's always in the way. That's why I fight him so much. Maybe I'll have to get him. Hard. When he least expects it...

* * *

A/N: Please hang with me, it's not what it looks like! 3XD I swear there's a plot in this somewhere!


	6. Entry 6

It's true, reviews are like crack. X3 Or at least 'fun'-sized candies. I'm homeschooled, on the last day of winter vacation, and starting to catch a cold. I have nothing to do today BUT update this again already. Enjoy!~

Disclaimer: I have never owned khr in my life.

* * *

(XX/XX/20XX)

Sorry for that scare yesterday, I caught Hibari looking through this book snickering. We'll see who's laughing...

I actually got that idea from watching some English sitcom called Full House, except I'm really going to do something to him later...

Dang, I really need a new place to hide this because, quite frankly, I don't think under the Bible in the motel drawer is working anymore.

Also, that Haru girl pointed out my hair today. I'm starting to get really annoyed, and if someone doesn't fix the mansion soon I might lose it! Well it turned out she was refering to the oils in it from the dirty showers here(no thank you) but still.

Also, I know I said 'we are Mafia', but this is a serious matter, and serious matters call for serious temporary peace treaties. Tonight's mission: Throw eggs at the couch Hibari's sleeping on with Takeshi. Er, Takeshi's on my team, not on the couch with Hibari.

...

I'm going to bed.

(The stupid room only comes with two beds and a couch! I have to share with Takeshi and the little cow-kid...)


	7. Entry 7

A/N: I will update story as frequently as I want.

...

WITH MY DYING WILL!

Disclaimer: Khr is not mine, or else it wouldn't have ended. Or at least Naito, Elena, and Shimon would've been in the anime! RAWR!

* * *

(XX/XX/20XX)

So the mansion is fixed FINALLY. Can't spell screwed without crew, right? Well, we have to fix up our rooms to look how we wanted them before the fire. But me and Chrome can fix our rooms how they were already with illusions, take that!

Speaking of the 'fire incident', I swear I will find whoever started it and scare them so bad they'll huddle by Jeff the Killer for protection!

Also, remember when you were found by Hibari? Gah I sound like a 12 year old girl now, but his face reading the Tsuna chapter was priceless. But after that, I thought I lost this and when I confronted Hibari thinking he took it, he laughed at me. Probably should've worded it better than "DID YOU STEAL MY FREAKKIN' DIARY SKYLARK PUNK?!" but I will not admit defeat to that idiot! If he's a 'carnivore' than I'm... A scavenger! Yeah, because carnivores have rules on what to eat, but scavengers are just like 'pft, whaterva'.

...I just read my entry, and I sound mental. -_- In the meantime, a new hiding place is in order.


	8. Entry 8

Disclaimer: Khr is not mine, but I'm making plans... =D

* * *

(XX/XX/20XX)

Tensions are slowing down now that everyone has been separated and did their own thing. However, I did noticed some trees with red flames and marks where they'd been hit by steel. It's even been raining furiously today.

The fire department is coming over today to find out what(or who...) started the fire. Kufufufufu...


	9. Entry 9

So this will be once or twice a day now to teach me discipline. ... Don't tell Hibari.

Disclaimer: Non ho KHR.

* * *

Same day.

(XX/XX/20XX)

...

...

...

...

So that fire was from Gianinni putting tin foil in the microwave.

...

...


	10. Entry 10

I'm so sorry for the late update! *facefloor*

Disclaimer: I do not own KHR.

* * *

(XX/XX/20XX)

I was just walking through the halls today when table came flying at me. I managed to duck and not get hurt, but WHY. why was there a FLIPPING TABLE flying through the air being chucked at my head?!

Upon further investigation, it was Gokudera and the little one fighting again. And Tsunayoahi gets on me and Hibari for doing that!


	11. Entry 11

Disclaimer: Wait, lemme check... Nope, still don't own khr.

* * *

(XX/XX/20XX)

The Sun Arcobelno told me I was to be Tsunayoshi's Italian language tutor. Kufufufu, oh heck yes...

Guardando avanti ad esso.. Kufufufu...

Good thing too, because this place IS BORNING! I'm seriously *this* close to going back to the Vendice!

...

Yeah, never going to happen.


	12. Entry 12

A/N: I'm so sorry I did it again! I put this off way too much! It...might happen again. -_-U Buuuut... I write this based off things that happened in my life... Learning Italian- not fun with Mukuro. Setting a microwave on fire- I forgot to put water in a cup ramen that said 'Do Not Microwave' right on the foam cup... Staying at a lousy hotel instead of somewhere comfy- lots of us have. Snapping at Hibari...

But now, on to your story!

Disclaimer: I don't own any trace of KHR save for certain fanfictions.

* * *

(XX/XX/20XX)

Hello Journal.

I suppose you're wondering why I'm up this tree? Well...

Hibari was asking for a prank this morning- practically begging me. I couldn't just sit by of course, so I decided to help a good friend in need.

Needless to say(but I will say it anyways), he didn't like the specific kind of prank. It was just ONE glass of ice!

So he chased me down, and the only safe haven I could see was this tree. I couldn't poof out of this side of the mansion, inside or out, for reasons I am not comfortable with telling, so this was my only choice. But now...

I'm actually a little scared of heights... I don't know how that 'future me' can fly around all day, this is scary enough! But I feel a little better writing in this now...

Ick, I said it, ok?

I just happen to carry this around in my secret hidden pocket in my old school jacket. Come to think of it, how did Kokuyo never get shot up by some depressed hurt kid who snuck a gun in that pocket? Well, they did let me in.

I'd better jump.

...

Or safely climb down. That sounds like a good, non-suicidal plan, too.

...

HOLD ON TIGHT!


	13. Entry 13

Disclaimer: I do not own KHR. *Insert funny phrase here.*

* * *

(XX/XX/20XX)

ZNZNZNNZNNNNZZNZNZNZNZNNZNZNZNNZNZNZNNZNZNZNZ

Tsunayoshi looked over my shoulder and told me to 'cross all that out!'and didn't leave me alone until I did. :(


	14. Entry 14

A/N: ACK! *head-desk*Sorry I didn't upload for four days! But after writing Whispers in the Dark(or maybe before...) I kinda lost my Dying Will...

But please enjoy the story in Tre, Due, Uno...!

Disclaimer: I do not own KHR, but I DO own this account, as well as the Khr-Rp-Leagues group on DeviantArt. ;)

* * *

(XX/XX/20XX)

So I was begging Tsunayoshi today for chocolate cake, but he just yelled at me. So I decided to make it myself. But we didn't have any chocolate cake mix. But Hibari DID have brownie mix. Good thing it's only me, Boss, and Lamby here.

Well actually, Laddy made it hard to do anything. Our conversation:

Me: I'm trying to make some brownies, would you kindly GET OFF?

Lamro: Bwahahahaha! Die evil pineapple head!

Me: Wha- I am not a fruit!

Lampu: Die!

Me: Quit hitting me! Or no brownies for you!

That shut him up pretty fast. Like I'd ever SHARE my brownies, though. Kufufufufu*munch*.


	15. Entry 15

A/N: Has anyone reviewed yet? *checks* Oh come on guys... TT_TT

Disclaimer: NOPE. NO HAS KHR.

* * *

(XX/XX/20XX)

Diary~,

There was this really awkward moment earlier when I accidentally bumped into Hibari-san. He kinda glared at me, but then walked away without saying anything. I wonder why he did that?

Then I played with Natsu, and he chased a scarf around the floor the whole time. It was really adorable~ But now how am I going to explain the burn mark and scratch marks on Haru-chan's old scarf?U


	16. Entry 16

Disclaimer: Read fore chapter.

* * *

Same Day.

(XX/XX/20XX)

...

Tsunayoshi color coated the journals. Evidently, someone thought this was hers. I will have to question Kyoya about this later...

* * *

LOL NOPE. :D


	17. Entry 17

A/N: Hahahahaha thank you talentlessDAWN. XD That was fun to open this up to. And thanks to everyone who makes me feel famous!~ *waves* You're fab-u-lous!~

Disclaimer: I do not own KHR..

* * *

(XX/XX/20XX)

Did you know today is Make People Uncomrfortable for Fun day?~

So far, I have:

Sat on the edge of Tsunayuoshi's desk.

Hugged Tsunayuoshi in front of Gokudera.

Said 'Hello' to Hibari.

Stared at Ken for a REAL longtime, then got up and left.

Told Takeshi eating bugs was good for you and ate a chocolate 'cricket'.

Took a stack of paperwork 'Boss' wanted Xanxus to do over to Varia Mansion.

Sat next to Viper. And scooted closer every time he/she moved.

Insisted he was female, even in adult form.

Annnnd let's just say I will never go near that 'Belphegor' character again... Until his birthday that is... Kufufufu~...

* * *

Advertisement: We(me and my friends) have started an rp group on DeviantArt for anyone who cares!~ Just go ahead and look up KHR-RP-Leagues or

SkyBoss27(my ironic username) on there if you wanna join!~


	18. Entry 18

A/N: KYAAAH! So sorry for the late update! I've been trying to catch up on KHR... I'm only on target 141 or so...

But but but, we're here now, so, yeah!? Let's just read now!...

Disclaimer: If you can guess my answer, I give you a virtual pinappo.

E(#)

* * *

(XX/XX/20XX)

Uri was lying on the chair next to my spot on the couch... And he rolled over and rubbed a paw against his face, showing his belly... Then he mewed the cutest sound an animal has ever made...

I couldn't help it... I aw'd out loud... Luckily I was only.

So I reached over and rubbed his belly. He purred and I picked him up and put him on my lap. I'm not normally a big fan of kittens, but it was too freaking adorable. Just don't let loose that I had a nosebleed to a kitten, or you go in the cleaning crew's tree branch shredder...

Then he sniffed my hand, so I held up my Ring and showed him a Mist Flame. Uri sniffed it, then started licking the Flames up, and oddly his own Storm Flames grew more.

Then the fun started.

Bakadera ran in shouting for Uri. When he saw his cat on my lap with more Flames than he'd come in with, he facepqlmed so hard it echoed. (mental note for later...) Then he asked how I got the 'viscious thing' to purr and curl up. I tried to say something witty, but then Uri jumped up and attacked his face. So he got what he deserved.

ANNNND that's all we have to chat about today. A Gatto Tempesta who ate Mist Flames. I don't even...

* * *

A/N: Aheh heh... I wish my cat did that when he rolled over. All he does is bite me... Speaking of being attacked by your own cat, I'm going to be cosplaying Gokudera with my friends. Ehh I WAS gunna be Uni, til I realized I didn't know enough about her to cosplay, but I'm pretty confident about Gokudera. ...Anyone have any cosplaying costume tips? TTΔTT

That'd be GREAT...

And my last message was...uh... Nevermind I forgot it to the extreme... *cough cough* ...Bye now...


	19. Entry 19

A/N: SOOOO a guest(you appear to have no name guest-sama D:) asked for longer chapters. Well, I did my best kid/adult/random crossbreed. -; ...

Disclaimer: Still no ownnnn!

(Please try to imagine this chapter in squiggly letters THAT'D BE GREAAAT)

* * *

(XX/XX/20XX)

And that's when he did it

Oh my gosh like I watched it all happen!

and then then He just did it.

Man that was crazy hahaha

I can't believe Hibari actually did all that!

Like he didn't care either man!

WHOO you go bro like a boss!

Yeah so that's how that ended.

You know what diary? i really love you tooo. Shoot I think I mispelled somethign in here...

Ya know what diary? just read read that to yourself . You, you know what to do.

Ugh my hands hurt so bad... It might be those pens I'm holding amd writting with. Darn you pens...


	20. Entry 20

A/N: I'M SORRY I DID THAT AGAIN TO THE EXTREME! But I'm here now right? Sorry, I've just been on DeviantArt way too much. By the way... If you want to have me draw a picture of your fave anime character(lineart or colored, always open!) then just look me up as SkyBoss27!

Anyways, enjoy!

Disclamier: Lol NOPE.

* * *

(XX/XX/20XX)

I finally found you!

Our floors started getting really wet for some reason on me, Chrome, and Yamamoto's rooms and we just found out rain was leaking through our newly made up window system, so we had to move in with others. I'm in Gokudera's room, but he just glares and leaves me alone, more than I can say for the one who would death grip my throat in my sleep or put boogers on my bed. But I was out on a mission in Europe(didn't realize I left you til already there...) when they found out it was the rain. (I'm gunna really do something wrong if I find out it was that Rain Guardian training in his room...) So Tsunayoshi had to come pack all my stuff and move it. I just now found you...((insert teardrop here, heh heh, Mukuro-chan...))

Anyways, to pass the time, I've created an emoticon for the Kokuyo Gang!

Me: *wÓ

Chrome: D.l

Fran: (|;W;|)

Ken: Ò=Ó

Chikusa: -oo-

Look,that's so cute. And that last one's the face he usuallg makes when Ken speaks, blinks, breathes, looks anywhere, or continues to live. Don't tell anyone else, but I know they like each other. They're good friends, really.

Oh- Gokudera's getting out of the bathroom, don't want him to actually see me writing in this! Bye bye, g'nite~!

* * *

A/N: ._. ... Yeah. Anyways, I still need cosplay tips, and work to do on DA. And this turned out longer than expected. Oh,and if you wanted to usethose emotes but were unsure go right ahead. Here's some others I use!

Tsuna: l_lw

Mammon: }

Ryohei: ^=^ (same as Ken I know I know...)

Belphegor: W_W W3W '3D

Pineapple: E(#) E(:3)

For the pineapple if you can you should use the Euro sign btw. just doesn't always show that up for some reason...

Also I'd like to hear about emotes you use. :D

EDIT: Oh no Marmmy what happened to your face? D: So for his face I'm not sure if it shows up every where else but use th little arrow sign thing as his mouth . Sorry.


	21. Entry 21

A/N: Guys... I have a poll on my profile if you want... ._.

Disclamier: DISCLAIMING KHR! TT_TTU

* * *

(XX/XX/20XX)

So that was fun. Lambo was running through the halls with Gokudera behind him, and he tripped and set off the ten-year-bazooka. His TYL self came out and literal got trampled by Gokudera, who couldn't stop fast enough. Then, the Varia had to come in for a big group meeting, and saw the two *ahem* on the floor. Now Belphegor won't leave Gokudera alone, whereas Lambo managed to escape back to his time. Now who's the creep Bakadera? NOW WHO?!

Anyyywaays, I have to go back and finish that mission. Appearantly something else came up that didn't get through to me on that mission to Northern Europe. Now I have to go finish.

-_- Kufufu, that's not very nice...


End file.
